We make it over the border to mexico. Tijuana to be exact.

Michael gave some advice along the drive. "Stick to revolucion, avoid walking strange places at night"

After a couple nights in a hotel in revolucion we decide to find an airbnb to see how a local lives, right now were about 8km out of the area, its 9:35 and iv been waiting for Alexis to return from the store.

10 minutes now, i try and calculate in my head how long it would be to walk there and back....

We flex the rules a little bit maybe. I try not to worry too much, there was 40 good reviews im sure its fine in the area, but the guy at the restaurant though felt the need to warn us leaving me feeling a bit conflicted and wary.

We spent some time at revolucion the first few nights but it definitely has a unique vibe. We have a little party but find ourselves questioning the safety of wandering around aimlessly late at night, then we begin googling things.....hmmm both more affordable & safer to travel by plane, after rearranging flights for a while we lock in Cancun>Bogota.

Were somehow really getting short once i finalise it, oh well we figure the way out later.

We found ourselves in the dodgiest stripclub earlier where everything was on sale.

I wonder if these women are happy with their lifestyle. Clubs like this in Thailand i could always see the emptiness in their eyes, these girls give a warm smile to each guy that walks through the door. It takes an average of 10 minutes before they proceed to the back room. They dont mess about, i take note of her taking every opportunity she can to tease him. They arent quite as subtle here and they wobble around on their too high stilettos and go straight for the dick grab. Its entertaining to see how well they have perfected this transaction. No time wasted.

The women were exotic yet somewhat disappointing, I am in awe of their ample ass and start to feel insecure at how many squats iv skipped in the past few months. I feel irregularly thin and weak.... i try to scratch the thought in to be more mindful of looking after my body. I walk into a shabby bathroom with a large clear cylinder of water in the corner. I question myself on the quality of the hygiene to wash my hands in it, i decide against.

"Baby" i look up to the single bathroom stall and accidentally lock eyes with her through the largish crack between the doors. Its the woman who was dancing just 10 minutes prior. "Is that your boyfriend out there? You want a lapdance for you two?"

Im not against it but politely decline, shes not my type, lazy dancer,  something about asking me through a toilet stall really took the mystery out of it all as well.

We down a couple more coronas but ok its time to go.

Im not drunk or lost enough to vibe with this scene and im still figuring out this area.

The next morning my mind is a fuzz, the buzz of the street makes me feel unsure.

We cross a guy who mentions he can show us the smoking bar.

In the mistyness of our minds we follow, the further away from revolucion we walk i start to reassess whats happening. When we get to the bar he buys us a beer. I note that its open, i can see Alexi giving me the heads up with a quick moment of direct eye contact. Im glad he noticed. The local has a bottle of water. Your not drinking we ask jokingly, as if to call him a pussy. He blames it on starting work soon but im not oblivious to the fact its 3pm already. Stranger behavior.

I pour a glass but pretend to sip it, after about 5 i play off my inability to drink as a hangover. He asks all the usual questions, anything too much we tip toe around. At one point were questioned on which hotel we stay in, up the road we reply.

I start to observe my surroundings. Im not the only white woman here actually, but i am the only one who is completely unfamiliar with her surroundings, that is clear. One woman in a brown dress at the bar must be around 50. I wonder what brings her here..... She looks soft and gentle but her hair is brittle and wirery, Before i look up again to check the bar shes out the door.

I like it here, the music is some of the best Spanish rap iv heard so far. Wish my phone wasnt fucked so i could shazam it. Fuck.....

Something doesnt feel right. I wouldnt say this guy comes across instantly untrustworthy but i keep my guard up anyhow. When i return from the bathroom to stash away my belongings in my underwear Alexis gives us the excuse to leave. Perfect timing, Im not sure if its the weed or i feel a little extra light headed. Must be placebo effect i think, i must have only drunk about 5mls with my very subtle fake sipping and its only been a few minutes, regardless we check behind us a couple times for any followers. Nope, clear. I start to feel as if maybe i have my guard up too high here but im slammed back down to reality the next morning when i réalise we lost 3,000 pesos during our little smoke bar journey, thats $200. A lot of money for this part of the world. Fuck. This has put me in a foul mood, i had some shit stolen back in Thailand this trip too. Never anything before this, im frustrated i became the victim again.

That sneaky motherfucker i think to myself, I want to punch him in his smug little Mexican face, i try to remind myself its just money. Block it out of my mind as well i can. 

More bad luck comes our way the next day, the bank card is lost. This was the onlyone we had left to access funds between us. I start to get a headache as i begin to even try and comprehend how to fix this problem right at this moment. Both of our phones are broken, how will i contact family or the bank..... in my pocket 100 pesos. This will be fun i think. We lay low until we can resolve the situation, we will wait until Cancun to sort things out. Nothing we can do now but wait.

We spend our last night in Tijuana speaking shit on the roof until early hours of the morning, its bright by 2:30am yet incredibly smoggy, im confused. Maybe its the lack of sleep thats got me out of wack. Soon were wondering where were headed after all this. Australia seems incredibly out of reach at this point. I start to research where its possible to get working visas for both of us, im soon sitting there in shock at how complicated this is going to be to achieve. It shouldn't be this hard surely..... twelve month processing period. I dont even know where im going to be next week let alone an entire year..... I feel overwhelmed. I wonder where exactly the freedom exists anymore in this systematic world. Why are we continuously forced to plan a future which may never come.... everything is against living life in the moment.

Time to sleep, Once i arrive on the plane en route to Cancun im exaughsted.

Tijuana drained many parts of me......